The Secret of Crying: How to Release your Tears

teardrop“I can’t cry.”

After our first article on this subject, The 7 Benefits of Crying after Heartbreak, we were flooded with this reaction. Guess what? Everyone cries. The difference is that some tears are eager to climb over our bottom lids while others stay shackled inside. If your tears repeatedly fall into the latter category, you may suffer from the notion that crying indicates weakness. Other factors that hinder a true release of tears include insufficient role models and lack of practice. In all of these cases, there is still hope that you can learn to cry. Letting your tears loose is an important part of the healing process, so give the techniques below a whirl.

The secret to crying is the production of physical tears. As opposed to sitting down and trying to make yourself cry, let’s simply aim to get the salty secretion to start. The purpose of this method is to fool your body into believing you are crying which will quickly guide you into a genuine cry. You see, your body cannot distinguish between a contrived tear and one that is produced naturally; therefore, when you start tearing, it builds the momentum that leads to a true emotional release. After the tearing begins, you will continue using visualization and eventually you’ll be in the midst of some serious water works. Enough talk – let’s cry!

First, visualize:
1.    Find a silent area. Sit comfortably on either a sofa or a chair.
2.    Relax the muscles in your face.
3.    Close your eyes. Take 5 slow and deep breaths in and out.
4.    Next, recall something sad – a pet passing, the loss of a friend, your break up. Take some time to find the right scenario before moving on.
5.    Now close your eyes again and visualize the scene you chose. Take your time to go through each of your senses at the time. How did the room smell? What were you touching? What details could you see? Was there a particular taste you can recall? What sounds did you hear? What was said?
6.    Walk yourself through the scene from beginning to end.
7.    Keep in mind how you feel and open your eyes.

Next, create the physical environment:
7.    Close your eyes again and rub them gently for about one minute.
8.    Open your eyes and hold your eyelids wide open with your fingers.
9.    Remain as such for up to 2 minutes trying to expose your eyes to as much air as possible. When your eyes begin to sting, this is a good sign. The tears should form soon.
10.    Begin to make sobbing noises. Breathe rapidly as if you are hyperventilating,
11.    Walk yourself through the visualization technique once again.

Other tips:
*Try crying along to a movie where the actor is crying.
*If onions make you tear, try cutting some up while using the visualization technique.
*Yawn multiple times. After the tears begin, use the visualization technique.
*Make sure your are fully hydrated. Drink plenty of water and try it again.

Have you had trouble crying? For further suggestions or questions, please comment below.

9 thoughts on “The Secret of Crying: How to Release your Tears

  1. Thing is, I don’t want to cry! Crying hurts. It’s like my chest my eyes my whole body they scream pain and I don’t wanna have to deal with that! I do feel like crying a lot and I even let out a few drops before I stop myself and start to get busy doing something else. I avoid watching sad movies, I talk to a lot of friends. I don’t want to cry! It’s not about weakness it’s the feeling I get from crying, once you let it out it doesn’t stop, I’ve been there before and it is physically exhausting.

  2. I thought i am the only one who don’t have emotions.. Because i cant cry no matter how dumb the situation is.. I tried alone to cry but it never worked for me.. Even it’s too hard to me to cry 😐

  3. I never knew I had so many tears inside, once they came, they haven’t stopped. Just when I’ve gone maybe a day or two, a trigger happens, it can be anything my exes fave commericial and here they come. My ex would always when we were together and happy and something sad occured would make me cry all he could say was STOP CRYING. Well if I need to talk to him about our son and its serious and I’m crying and he tells me to stop, I now proceed to tell him he has no right. Please know I do not say it in anger but after so many years of having to swallow back tears and make myself stop I am finally free to cry.

  4. Hi – I can’t believe there is an article about crying – this was written for me. I’ve always had an issue letting out my tears!!

  5. I think I need a lesson on how to stop crying. Once I start, it seems the faucet has just burst and there is no shutting off the tears. It’s draining.

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